“Be the type of friend you’d want to have.” – Unknown.
How many of you have heard this saying in some point of your lives? I know I have. Growing up, my mom would always say that to me when giving friendship advice. As I grew older though, my mother’s message began to change. She went from telling me that I needed to be the type of friend that I wanted to have, to teaching me how to be the type of friend each different individual needs. She helped me to shift the focus from ‘giving what I want to receive’ to a much selfless act of being what someone else needs.
My feelings used to get really hurt when I would give, support and love someone exactly how I wanted to receive that same affection but it never came. I had to realize that there is only one me and when I give or do those things, I should do it out of the kindness of my heart and not expecting to receive anything in return. In no way am I saying my mother’s initial teaching was wrong because even still to this day I am a firm believer of what goes around comes around, so if I don’t want it to be done to me then I shouldn’t do it to others. What I am trying to say is that in some point of your life, you have to transition your “me” focus of what you want to have to “friend” focus and finding out what the other person needs to elevate higher and become greater in life.